A frustratingly slow start…
Three days into 2012 and already I’ve found myself in tears over running. Not because I can’t do it. I just haven’t. And the Virgo, perfectionist, running junkie inside of me is screaming for a run.
After a very long ride home yesterday in some pretty nasty weather, the plan was to go to the gym and at least get in a run on the treadmill. But, lack of sleep and fatigue from the car trip made that the last thing I wanted to do.
And then…after bypassing the opportunity for my first run of the season, instead…I fussed and obsessed over the fact that I have not logged any mileage yet in the New Year. It truly bothered me. And I knew…I knew I should have gotten on that treadmill yesterday. I should have at least gotten in a short run if nothing else. In the grand scheme of things, no matter what is going on in my life…I always, always feel better after a run. If I’m tired, I wake up. If I’m angry, I lighten up. If I need to think, I get a lot off my mind. And so on.
I had a lot pulling at me yesterday and even my roommate told me to go do my run. That I would feel better. But I’m a stubborn person and I refused. And so…here I sit on the third day of the year with goal of 500 miles…and nothing to show for it yet.
Frustrating? You bet!
So, it’s time for an attitude adjustment. I have a goal. And to reach that goal, certain things need to happen. And I can make all the excuses I want, but I also need to be accountable to my goal. So…taking a deep breath and starting fresh.
500 miles. It’s definitely obtainable. And I will not beat myself up should it feel like I’m not getting there. I know I can do it. And I know I will do it. I’m just impatient. And I’m really bad about beating myself up if I feel I’m doing nothing toward the goal.
That being said…I start today.